Poker Poetry
Poems from the Mind Of An Online Poker PlayerArchive for May, 2008
Those Pocket Kings
Those Pocket Kings
they complicate things
very strong hand
can’t take the swings
heads up against aces
not much of a chance
but against an ace rag
I break out in dance.
Sucking Out
Opponents suck out
I hate it real bad
sometimes I suckout
and forget that i had…
get real pissed off
when it happens to me
but i’ve done it too
proper play is the key
Doyle Brunson
They Call him Texas Dolly
Been around since Buddy Holly
Been on lots of Journeys
Played In Lots Of Tourneys
His Games as Sweet As Honey
He’s always in the money
Go one on one with Doyle
Your game will be spoiled.
Big Blind Special
Havin a hell of a time
now i’m in the blind
still cant get cards
though i’m playin with some tards
no one makes a raise
i guess this hand plays
trap to the river
always makes me shiver
all in against his aces
dumb look on all there faces.
Mike Matusow
Mike Matusow
Big like a cow
down on himself
when his brain is on a shelf
Sometimes he plays great
other times he discombobulates
either way
its fun to watch him play.
Cold Cards
Playin $5 and $10
can’t seem to win
the cards are runnin cold
this is getting old
hang around to long
all my earnings gone
Someday i’ll learn
to fold before the turn
Chris Ferguson
Chris Ferguson
real good at math
his hair is ratty,
may need a bath? 
he’s real good at poker
talented as hell
don’t dare flinch a eyebrow
he’ll pick up the tell
E-S-P-N
Watchin the Main Event
on E-S-P-N
wandering how it would feel
to be there playin
a very long tourney
that no pro can win
always a newbie
knocking out Scotty Nguyen
The final Table is crazy
Its so entertaining
the first 6 times i seen it
then it gets draining
reruns all the time
i think its a sin
reruns again and again
On E-S-P-N
Phil Hellmuth
Phil Hellmuth is good
He’s won 11 bracelets
hes also an a-hole
and nothing rhymes with bracelets
gotta give him credit
he’s got some balls
if it wasn’t for luck
he’d win them all
Ode To Bad Beats
Sittin mid position
Whats his imposition?
callin my raise
with a hand no one plays
got lucky on the turn
another card to burn
sucked out on the river
there goes my liver
* This Poem was inspired by a bad beat in the Sunday Million at Pokerstars
